Well its been a number of months since any news from me and this next series of blogs I have called Soul Shots. They have less of a focus on travel destinations and more so the Journey. After all the name of this blog is SOULsa searching. So here is a quick snap shot of some of the lessons I have learned in the level of the soul!
Last year every destination I traveled had a purpose or some insight into how exactly we go about finding our bliss. So what happens when you are still? Running around the world as a free spirit is great but what if that isn’t an option right now? What if the clearest path is just to stay?
There is the cliche saying “it’s not the destination but the journey” once you finish with your eye rolls of this instagramesque quote there is a truth. How can you move forward if you are not content with at least some of what is in front of you?
That is where I have been at the last few months. Seeing clearly goals that I want to manifest and knowing the best course of action is to sit tight and be patient. During my stillness I have dragged myself through countless stories of “it’s not happening”, “why not now” and “it’s not fair” making the opportunities and life I am living at the moment not so fun. To paraphrase Eckhart Tolle, I am arguing with what “is”
To argue with your reality is to cause yourself harm and most likely you will be seeking to drag others down with you. Sounding familiar? This is a lesson I thought I had learnt quite well but turns out not so much. When I get tired, frustrated with a not so good day at the office I can start to make it more than just “a bad day” , an epic saga of Poor me, down trodden victim with no reprieve in sight!
My main problem is I argue with the timeline of how my life is working, as I look back at the paragraph I can quite logically see that six months is nothing in the scheme of life or corporate ladders, however at the peaks of my anxiety this has felt unending.
At this point that voice inside me head, lets call her Negative Nancy creates this really awesome story around how unfair life is, how hard done by I am and how other people are moving ahead faster than me. BAM! Nancy and I have just purchased our tickets for the midnight screening of Hard Knock Life- The tale of poor Zac.
After the movie is done I then enrol my loving caring friends and family to support me and they listen to the same crazy complaints as I melt down over and over again.
Nancy and I have engineered the perfect attention seeking sob story of how tough life is and then continue to repeat to anyone who will listen! Guess who else is listening, Life is and Life will always give you what you want. Life says “oh ok that’s what you want, cool here have at it”, providing you with more evidence and giving you and Nancy a season pass to your favourite movie.
So what can you do? Well for starters stop buying a ticket to the show! This is easier said than done but you know how this ends, with you and Nancy outside in the cold sharing a cigarette at 1am rambling about all the conspiracies Life has against you.
It is ok not to be ok and sometimes, especially when there isn’t much you can change about your situation. If you are feeling stuck with something maybe the one thing you can change is the story you are telling. If Nancy knocks at your door for your weekly date ask yourself “Do I really want to take in this show again? ” Or am I more interested in seeing something different play out?
You can’t change the characters, the location, timeline or even the plot at points but maybe the smallest shift from “oh god how is this going to turn out” to “I wonder how this will turn out” can keep Nancy back where she belongs, at home watching re runs of Sex in the City in her Snuggie.
What if this slowing down or stillness is life happening FOR you instead of against you. What if this extra time give you a chance to catch your breath before the next big shift. Smell the roses, go on a date with someone else apart from Nancy, go take a Latin Lover or do something else that sparks a bit of joy along the way. When all else fails I always fall back on these three words. It is happening. So trust the process.
What stories have you got stuck in lately? Anyone else spent a night out with Nancy? let me know in the comments below and I will see you soon with another SOUL Shot.
If you are really struggling please call Lifeline 13 11 14 in Australia. Sometimes it is more than just Nancy and thats when we all need a little more help.